Goodbye – for now :

Today I am leaving for a new job with better opportunities. But even if the new beginning are so rewarding, I have to leave behind things that I was used to and people that I love. I have written this poem because I love my friend so much. I will miss her company every day but most of all - I will miss her just being there for me - EVERYDAY. Even if both of us had a bad day.

I will miss you!

Goodbye - for now :

Every thing has to end
Even the rainbow
With a pot gold

The sun need to stop shining
To give us the beautiful sky

The sea has to come to shore
So that we can play and swim

Ice-cream with yummy chocolate
All at the end

When we say goodbye we hug and smile
Mmm, what a treat... squeeze

To do it all over again
Tommorrow or the other day

Today I say goodbye
But with a cry

I will be sad for a little while
But it will end - like everything else

Do not cry now
Do not fear

There is a new beginning
Outa there

Happy I will leave here
With wisdom - have no fear

I bid you goodbye
With a hug
And a smile

- H. De Villiers -

Playful Happy :

Where does the road of happiness lead

Does it end or calm down

Who could tell me where to find

The unanswered in my mind

All day long I have to watch

The love and happiness that they've got

On the TV and in every show

Displays of never-ending love

Is it real

Does it exist

Or is it only ment

For the chosen princess

All this greed and foolishness

How could the world still exist

As a happy place for you and me

If all day long we have to fight

For that which rightfully is mine

How could we live together

Peacefully and adored

Distanced from one-another

Yet one in all our greed

Finding a way to love

Unconditionally

Is this ment for me?

Should we really live with all of this

Why all of this struggle and hunger

To be a part of what we need

Love and warmth of our souls

We brake each other down

To seek that what we don't grant

For the one that is left behind

Should we then play this game called love

The one thing that was given

From our God above

For all of us to have

Was love

Then why should we seek

Why should we fight

For the given

To be mine

Could we not stop this dispute

This hate and detestation

For one-another

For love

Do you not find it ridiculously ironic

That the only thing we all have

We still fight for every day

Ignorantly leaving it behind

Play all you want

Deny what you've done

But don't destroy

The only thing you need

This thing called love

- H. De Villiers -

Dearest boy :

Recently I have become the proud godmother of my eldest sisters first child.

This is also the first baby in our family, so I am quite new with the babysitting thing.

This little boy have crept in my heart so deeply that it hurts to much to try and explain. I can not imagine my life without him. My pappa (the proudest grandfather that I know) will travel 30min longer to work just to see his happy smile. He calls him “oupa kind” (granddaddies child). He want to make sure that the first thing out of his mouth is not Mum or Dad, no, it should be GRANDPAPPA!

Dirk is not only his name, but my fathers name as well –

therefore the “Oupa kind” name....

With the arrival of this little one (which was the biggest baby that I have ever seen) came a lot of reality. It made me think of how this world is not made for the “nakedness” that comes from being so little and defenseless.

We can’t give him milk before the bottle is sterilized ext.

Our internal defense meganisme need to get “used” to all the crap in the world before we will be able to digest or survive it.... how true.....

Why is it that there’s so many wickedness in this world and our system can’t resolve it with out adaptation? Non of us where born with a build in anti virus. All of us need to adapt to one thing or another some time in our lives. Some of us have the protection that’s needed (wealth...maybe for some, for others like my.... faith...) and some of us need to build stronger defense meganismes before we can be granted as the same in society.

Oh and there I go again... what was I saying...

So, this poem I wrote for my Dirk boy. I tried to make it as light as possible because I think that if I start to spell out the world for him, he will not like it at all.

I hope that you enjoy this as much as I enjoy looking into my baby’s eyes – kissing him so much until he’s pink all over his face.

Love,

H

Dearest boy :

My sweet baby boy

How wonderful to know your name

You come to us like sun in the rain

Filling all of us with joy

Happiness that you shine

the divine pleasure being all mine

Peacefully

As you lay there in your sleep

Soft and sweet

protected by your mothers warmth

covert in a blanket of love and prosperity

The world will try and take your soul

Keep your faith in our God

And you will love forever more

Let our God protect your soul

from all the wickedness in this world

Your heart will question undeniably

all that was build and left to be

not that is mine but your legacy

Keep on laughing every day

Singing and dancing in the suns ray

Little happy boy of mine

Let the world not destroy your mind

Happiness lay in your heart

Don’t stop smiling come what may

Your smile - our firely delight

creeping in our hearts without sight

Skip and hop in the paddles of rain

Play till the end of this day

My wish to you my little boy

Is to find the best in life

And make it yours forever more

Do not forget us little boy

We will always be here

Whatever come

Whatever may

Forever you will remain

mesmerized in our minds

We will always be

Your family

- H. De Villiers -

What I want :

I want you to treat me
Not like a fool
But like I’m the queen of the world
Look at me like I will not be here tomorrow
Touch me like raindrops on my skin
Creeping with in
Love me so much that it hurts
Give me your soul
Your heart
Your bliss
Let happiness form part of your smile
Filling me up burning my inside
Make me hole once again
Be my civilization
My cascade of memories
Take this pain inside of me
And revolve it into peacefulness
Calming my mind
Resting my soul
Rollercoaster we will ride
Up and down
In my heart in my mind
Tripping on your wisdom
Weakening my insanity
In your heart I’ll always stay
Not for tomorrow
Not for a day
But for the life that was granted
For you and me
In this humanity

- H. De Villiers -

Africa :

I breath and smile

... a hungry child dies

We go on living our normal life

while somewhere in Africa

... a hungry child dies

Our worries are filled with selfish greed

money and wealth all we need

while somewhere in Africa

... a hungry child dies

Laughing and singing all day long

playfully forgiving the sins within

while somewhere in Africa

... a hungry child dies

Warmly wrapped with the blanket i have

ready to sleep safe and relaxed

while somewhere in Africa

... a hungry child dies

You breath and you smile

... a hungry child died

- H. De Villiers -

Gaining Sanity :

they said that i will not make it

they said that i will have to much pain

they said that without you i'm ruined

they are cruel and vain

how could you be so insane?

every day since you are gone

have been the best day for so long

your eyes deceiving

your touch grieving

how could i let you destroy me this way?

my mute reaction

to your painful distraction

my defense to your traction

one day at a time

will i rebuild that what you destroyed

in a word of your poisoned thoughts

pain that was not mine

inflicted on me

unwillingly

do not blame me

for i was hypnotized

by your insanity

how could i be so blinded

by your frozen hearted sincerity

your glaring abstraction

killing me delicately

i will be stronger without your madness

constructing my own loyalty

my sorrowed eyes

because of all your lies

i will be stronger

one day at a time

my heart distracted

by worldly hatred

softly building fearlessness

to fill this hollow

you left me with

slowly defrosting

my frozen mind

filling me with icy warmth

shadows of darkness

fading still

sadness turning in gladness

i will be happy still

- H. De Villiers -

One Last Kiss :

When the night turns cold and all that is left behind is me and my mind

Then I wonder why it all had to end with such deep pain inside

I can still feel your hands on my shoulders as you kiss me goodbye for one last time

Your cheek touching mine as you pull me close and hug me so warm inside

That one last word burning my inside

Then I sit and think about the pain that follows

About how you left me so cold and without any sorrow

How you made me realise that for us there is no tomorrow

Behind this laughter and happiness I show

Is this pain you left me the day before tomorrow

Now my heart turned cold and with no sorrow

I am now danger to the man that will follow….

Say no more goodbye say no more one last time

- H. De Villiers -

Addiction :

Oh dear friend of mine
How happy you make me feel
To think that you are only 10g
And sleep in a can
You are my source of laughter
My source of tears
You make me fall
You make me feel
You make me wane be
Breath in breath out

Breath in breath out
Oh dear friend of mine
Never let me go
For what am I on my own
I will not be able to stand by myself
Or even make it past the day
Please let me fall
Let me cry
Let me feel
Once in a while

Oh dear friend of mine
Please don’t let me go!
Deep breath in breath out

Oh dear friend of mine
Help me make it to the night
The time is standig still
So is al this feelings in-site
The pain is ripping me apart
Tearing my insides out
Flaming shadows brighten the sky
Help me Oh dear friend of mine
Slow breath in Slow breath out

Oh dear friend of mine
Let me rest on your shoulders still
Dry the tears streaming down
And let me fall one last time
Pick me up and throw me down
Show me the way out of this host I call mine
Hold me warm
Hold me tight
Be with me oh dear friend of mine
No breath in or out

- H. De Villiers -

Starshine :

Golden ray of Light

Brighten up shadows

Warming up thy heart

Happiness your goal

Removing cheerlessness

Redefining into smiles

Hot air rush

Affection take your breath away

Shimmer all over

Magnificent

Not enough to describe

The kindness of your heart

Holding on to the light

Of an Angel in thy heart

Burning pleasure

Shining for but a few hours

Burning out

To fall apart

Leaving marks

Of hope

Twilight of delight

- H. De Villiers -

Way up high :

Fly away with me

Touch the sky

Float on the clouds

Dance in the rays of stars

Lift me up

In the air so high

Holding on to the one you love

Never to be left on your own

Always being comforted

Feelings the strength

Being saved and loved

Let me float

On the world above

- H. De Villiers -

The voice whisper :

Open your ears
Listen
You will hear the most amazing thing
The sound of truth
Trust
and wisdom

Take a moment
Sit
Let your thoughts surround you
Face reality
Hope
and dependence

Open your eyes
Look
You will see the wonders of each day
Filled with laughter
Magic
and thrills

Don’t make conclusions
This will lead to brokenness
Failure
Sadness
and regret

Open your ears, eyes and thoughts
to the sound feeling and wisdom
of the wonderful delight of conviction
Optimism
Richness
Knowledge
and happiness

- H. De Villiers -